I have some bad news: Everything in our world and everything about you is going to change and someday, come to an end. However, I also have some good news: Everything in our world and everything about you is going to change and someday, come to an end.

What do I mean? Material success is temporary and we have to continuously work hard to flourish and maintain a high level of health, wealth, and our overall wellbeing. All of our problems are temporary, and through hard work and determination, we can overcome any obstacle and face any challenge set in front of us. With continuous effort, hard work, and the desire to grow, we can make lasting changes and create our dream life.

If transformation is conceivable, and everything is impermanent, why do we then continue to struggle with the same problems day in and day out without any noticeable changes?

After much deliberation, I came to realize that change is hard. It is not due to a persons’ desire or social support, but rather due to the truth that the average person often uses their past experiences to judge themselves now. As a result, because he or she has struggled yesterday, last week, last year, and for the last decade, history tells us that we will struggle tomorrow, next week, next year, and for the next 10 years.

This is not accurate. We are not our past. Our past is a narrative of who we were, not who we are today and who we will be tomorrow. Letting go of the past is healthy and it is fundamental if you plan to grow and evolve as a person.

The consequences of being dragged down by your past are far-reaching. These consequences can negatively impact your self-view, your relationships, and your dreams. In addition, it can create daily feelings of sadness and frustration. And all of this is unnecessary.

Letting go of the past is arduous. Letting go of negative people, bad ideas, false beliefs, and unhealthy relationships is the only way to change our narrative and create the life we desire. Every day, each individual moment presents an opportunity to create a new life for ourselves, to remove negative feelings from the past, open ourselves up to the possibility of the moment, and take action to create an incredible future.

6 Ways To Let Go of The Past

1. Make the decision to let it go.
2. Express your pain — and your responsibility.
3. Stop being the victim and blaming others.
4. Focus on the present — the here and now — and joy.
5. Forgive and forget.
6. Do not wait one more minute for an apology.

Although we can intellectually understand that we are not our past narrative, knowing this truth and letting go of the past are two very different situations. Holding onto the past is always damaging in some way. Even holding onto positive events from the past can create limitations in our lives when setting boundaries for the future we want to live. More often than not, we hold onto the past because of our need for certainty

Certainty is a fundamental human need. We all have a need to feel certain in life, so we can avoid pain and discover comfort. Letting go of the past is frightening because it forces us to step into the unknown and create a different life in the future than the one we live today.

Change is hard and it is difficult to be vulnerable. It can be overwhelmingly uncomfortable to have that sense of uncertainty about what lies ahead. To counter this feeling, we hang on to the past, because even if it is steeped in pain, it is a pain we are familiar with and are certain about.

We all need to let go of the past, both positive and negative pasts, to fully enjoy the next stage of our lives. Learning to let go of the things that are not serving you positively will free up energy and resources so that you can begin to reap the benefits of a grateful, joyful life.

Five Ways To Let Go of The Past And Learn To Live Life on Purpose

1. Take The Time To Understand The Past: Take time to reflect on your own history as a third party looking in without judgment; simply observe. Understand that you are not your past. Understand that the situations, patterns, and people in your life created your experiences. However, they did not create you. Knowing and understanding your past and some of your patterns will help you to recognize why you hold on and repeat self-destructive behaviors. Understanding creates awareness; awareness helps you break the cycle.
2. Accept Your Past And Live In The Present: Accept your history and the people that have been a part of your history; accept your circumstances and remember that none of these define you. Acceptance is the first step to letting go and setting yourself free. Learn from the monk in the story: carrying bitterness, anger, or animosity burdens no one, but you.
3. Transform Your Narrative: Simply put, we are our story. Not so much the story of the events in our lives, but the story we tell ourselves about the role we played in the events—hero or victim, beloved or unworthy, competent or careless. One powerful strategy for easing the pain of the past is to rewrite key aspects of the story from a more balanced, empathetic perspective. A healthy rewrite makes you less victimized, less devastated, and less lost than the one you told yourself at the time of the original injury. It reduces the feelings of deep rage, loss, and fear that have been holding you back.
4. Believe In Yourself: Believe in your purpose. Believe that the universe is unfolding as it should and that you have a divine roll to play. Believe that holding on does nothing but hold you back from that purpose.
5. Anchor Yourself In The Future: It is hard to let go of the past in the absence of a positive view of tomorrow. You need to see a vision of the future. An investment in, a distraction through, or an excitement about something ahead will supply the energy and the will to push you beyond the past.

Have you ever been acquainted with someone who has low confidence? How does this person come across to you? Do they always seem to carry the weight of the world on their shoulders? Did you ever observe this person speaking negatively about their personal life or gossip about the misfortune of others? What about seeming jealous of other people’s success in life?

They make it seem like all of their problems and failures are on the fault of others, as if the world owes them something, and that life is unfair or out to get them. A person who lacks confidence has a lack of self-belief, usually caused by a sense of uncertainty about something or about themselves.

People with low self-esteem tend to see the world as a hostile place and themselves as its victim. As a result, they are reluctant to express and assert themselves. They often miss out on experiences and opportunities and feel powerless to change things. This effectively lowers their self-esteem and further pushes them into a downward spiral.

As Mindful People Living A Spiritual Life In The Material World, How Do We Become Both Spiritually And Materially Successful? How Do We Realize Work Life, Spiritual Life, And Personal Life Success?

Part of the practice to becoming successful in all areas of life, is to develop habits that lead us to becoming a more confident person, to unearth our own truth, keep to our own distinctive path, and to take responsibility for our lives. We must become confident and carry the knowledge that we are powerful beings capable of overcoming any obstacle, we can face any challenge, and we are able to achieve unlimited levels of success and lasting happiness.

The questions are, “how do we become more confident?” and “how do we develop faith in ourselves to no longer blame others for our struggles in life?” We must learn to take charge of who we are and set out to live our Dharma, our truth. Nobody is born with limitless self-confidence. If someone seems to have incredible self-confidence, it is because he or she has worked on building it for years. Self-confidence is something that you learn to build up because the challenging world of business, and life in general, can deflate it.

Confidence can be explained as an individuals’ certitude to succeed and inherit conviction in his or her abilities to face any challenge head-on. Self-confidence means being assured in your own worth, ability, and power, regardless of the situation you are in. Someone who is self-confident has a strong sense of self-belief and certainty in him or herself. He or she exudes calmness, composure, and is self-aware in their abilities. In order to become self-confident we must embrace who we are at this very moment.

7 Steps To Help You Be More Confident

• Visualize yourself as who you want to be each morning before you start the day.
• Affirm yourself with daily affirmations.
• Do one thing that scares you every day.
• Question your inner critic through the daily practice of mindfulness mediation.
• Set yourself up to win by asking others for help.
• Help someone else achieve his or her goal.
• Care for yourself and take time out of your day to reset and care for your personal needs.

Your level of self-confidence can surface in multiple ways: your behavior, your body language, how you speak, and what you say. Fundamentally, self-confidence is linked directly to how you feel about yourself and your abilities. Your self-worth, whether it is high, low, or somewhere in-between, has a great impact on your life. Even the greatest leaders lack self-confidence at certain times. Self-confidence is not a static quality; rather, it is a mindset that takes effort to maintain. Self-confidence can be learned, practiced, and mastered just like any other skill. In other words, we must learn to find a deep and profound love for our inner being

Self-confidence is unmistakably an asset in life. Not only does it make you feel better emotionally and mentally, but it also sets you up toward achieving your goals. When you are confident, it helps you fearlessly pursue your goals. It gives you the belief to conquer your challenges, no matter how insurmountable they seem.

Practice These Core Techniques To Strengthen Your Belief System And Improve Your Self-Confidence

1. Know Your Weaknesses and Strengths: It is essential to recognize your natural strengths. When you realize your inherent abilities, the next step is to focus on the things that you are good at doing.
2. Accept yourself: You are unique spiritual beings. It is important not to beat yourself up over the things that you have trouble doing. Instead of complaining about your weaknesses, try to find ways to improve your life.
3. Remember Your Victories: Many people downplay their successes and focus on their struggles in life. Always remind yourself of your past accomplishments no matter how small they may be. Break the habit of focusing on the negative parts of your life and instead concentrate on your achievements.
4. Read Positive Affirmations: It is important that you read affirmations that make you feel confident. Read a self-help book and then write down all of the things that motivate you. Read something positive on a daily basis and reflect on what you can do to improve your situation.
5. Create S.M.A.R.T Goals: Set achievable goals on a regular basis and then take small steps to accomplish them. Make sure your goals are measurable and monitor your progress. Do not get upset if you are unable to accomplish all of your goals. You can always change your goals so that you can be more successful.
6. Be Persistent: Do not give up in achieving your goals in your life. Learn from your mistakes and try to improve on your situation. Do not make excuses on why you should quit or give up. Sometimes it takes a lot of effort to be successful. The key is to keep at it until you get what you want and are able to achieve your goals.

Happiness and success in life don’t transpire when we have acquired a lot of stuff, but rather when we have nurtured lasting and meaningful relationships with people. Human beings are by nature social creatures; we crave friendship and love, just as we do food and water. The better our relationships, the happier we are in life.

As mindful individuals living life on purpose, we recognize that true joy arises when we learn to love people and utilize things rather than loving things and using people. However, in modern times, living in a virtual world, connected through social media and virtual dating, it has become harder and harder to develop a community of supportive friends and family.

Developing long-lasting intimate relationships requires hard work. Yet positive relationships form a solid foundation for happiness and success. We all have bonds we have chosen to form; friends, family, and romantic interests. How we choose to navigate and participate in these relationships has a significant impact on our happiness as well as our health and wellbeing. Developing positive relationships will make us happier, while negative relationships will cause us unnecessary pain and suffering.

Relationships, when observed with an open mind, show us our true selves. Sometimes the people in our lives can be a reflection of who we really are and how we treat other people. More often than not, when we don’t like something about a person, it is a mirror of what we do not like about ourselves. Relationships provide us with an opportunity to observe who we truly are in life. We can, on a moment-to-moment basis, pay attention to what we are thinking, feeling, or doing in response to what is happening externally. We can plug into our life story anytime and learn from it.

Best of all, every day we get a chance to practice acting from love. This goes beyond doing something nice for someone. Acting from love requires us to recognize the times when fear arises within us, and work to overcome it so we don’t choose a course of action from a fearful place. That takes awareness, hard work, and courage, but in those moments, when we choose love, we truly grow as human beings.

There are Three Levels of a Relationship:

Level One: Selfish Relationships: My Needs Come First – This is the least mature level – one or both partners are focused on meeting their own needs first. The relationship is fragile. There is an erosion of trust and togetherness and there are regular conflicts or disputes.

Level Two: Conditional Relationships: You Get Yours And I Get Mine – This level is based on a subtle agreement between two people: “You get yours and I get mine.” The relationship is a contract of favors where people keep track of who does what for who and payment is expected in return for services rendered.

Level Three: Valued Relationships – This is the strongest relationship a person can form with other individuals. People put other people’s needs first. Relationships are based on adding value without expecting anything in return. There is an attitude of service just for the joy of helping others.

Creating Level Three Relationships takes hard work and continuous effort. Level Three Relationships are positive; we feel happiness, elation, contentment and calm. Level Three Relationships with our friends and family help us build our self-worth and self-image. Level Three Relationships provide support in times that we struggle, unconditional love, and a reason for doing many of the things we do, which helps give our lives meaning. Level Three Relationships provide us with a sense of identity and belonging.

There are Seven Master Relationships Skills to Help us Build Level Three Relationships

1. Heartfelt understanding
2. Giving what they really need
3. Creating and building trust and respect
4. Reigniting playfulness, presence and passion
5. Harnessing courage and embracing honesty
6. Uncovering and creating alignment
7. Live consciously: be an example

Healthy relationships enhance your life and make everyone feel good about themselves. They don’t just happen though; healthy relationships take time to build and need work to keep them healthy. The more positive effort you put into a relationship, the healthier it should be. Below are Four Suggestions on How You Can Build Better Healthier Relationships with the People in Your Life. May all beings be happy and free; may all our thoughts, words and actions contribute in some way to that happiness and to that freedom for all.

Below are Four Actionable Steps You Can Take To Begin to Build Level 3 Relationships

1. Clear communication: Communication is the cornerstone of every strong relationship. You will not always agree with your partner, but if you have a foundation of respect and clear communication it will be much easier to resolve any conflicts that arise.
2. Practice acknowledging when your partner goes beyond the call of duty, even for little things, like doing that chore you hate to do. Speak honestly about any actions that make you feel hurt, stressed, guilty, or bad in any way, but avoid blaming, shaming, or isolating your partner. Listen to one another and have a productive conversation.
3. Speak honestly about any actions that make you feel hurt, stressed, guilty, or bad in any way, but avoid blaming, shaming, or isolating your partner. Listen to one another and have a productive conversation.
4. Accept and celebrate differences. One of the biggest challenges we experience in relationships is that we are all different. We can perceive the world in many ways. Certainly, a stumbling block that we come across when we try to build relationships is a desire or an expectation that people will think like we do and, in this way, it is so much easier to create a rapport. We feel more comfortable when we feel that people “get” us and can see our point of view. Life, however, would be very dull if we were all the same and, while we may find it initially easier, the novelty of sameness would soon wear off. So, accepting and celebrating that we are all different is a great starting point.