Live the Best Year of Your Life

Live the Best Year of Your Life

Live the Best Year of Your Life

You may have tried to change your life before without much success. However, with an effective process, it’s possible to achieve more in a single year than most manage to achieve in a lifetime.

> Most New Year’s resolutions are little more than wish lists with no chance of success. In fact, the average person forgets all about their resolution within a few weeks.

> Setting goals is a powerful process, but only if done correctly. There’s much more to be done than making a list of desires and then waiting passively for them to be delivered.

Your current life situation is a combination of several factors. Your beliefs, past, habits, expectations, and resources are all factors.

A spectacular life requires balance. Wealth isn’t a substitute for poor health. A great relationship isn’t a substitute for having insufficient financial resources.

Making the next year the best year of your life is within your control. But there are several requirements. You have to know what you want, develop habits that support your goals, drop the habits that don’t support your goals, deal with obstacles, and stay the course.

Review Your Past

Common wisdom suggests that you should keep looking forward and leave the past in your rearview mirror, but this can be a mistake. The past has much to reveal. At the very least, you can learn where you’ve made mistakes. This is important, because you’ve been making the same mistakes over your lifetime.

> The reason your last relationship ended is likely to be the same reason your next relationship will end.

> Financial challenges repeat themselves.

> Your past challenges with work will be your future challenges at work.

> Your diet and exercise plans will fail for the same reasons they’ve failed in the past.

Failing to examine and address the challenges of the past is choosing to repeat your challenges and failures throughout the rest of your life.

The past also includes some pretty great things. Failing to identify these things is an obstacle to enjoying similar success in the future.

While answering the following questions, consider all areas of your life:

> Physical/health

> Finances

> Relationships

> Work

> Hobbies

> Spiritual/religious activities

> Family

Reviewing the past is a critical component of creating the future:

1. What were the highlights from last year? Create a list of at least five positive experiences from the last year. Go with your gut. Anything that fills you with positive emotions can be a highlight. It might have been something as simple as spending a perfect afternoon at the park with your child.

> Avoid relying on society’s values when defining your own success. It’s a success if it feels like a success. That may or may not align with conventional measures of success. Decide for yourself.

2. What were the low points and how could they have been avoided? It wasn’t all good. There had to be a few days or experiences you don’t want to repeat. Make a list of them and consider how these experiences could have been avoided. Minimizing the low-points in life is as crucial to your happiness as adding high points.

> Should you have been able to foresee the occurrence of these experiences?

> How can you prevent a future reoccurrence?

3. What were the best decisions you made over the last year? You undoubtedly made some shrewd decisions last year. What were they? How can you apply this information in the future?

4. What were the worst decision from the last year? Everyone makes mistakes. What were yours? When you look even further into the past, have you made similar bad decisions? Why?

5. What are five positive habits you’d like to add this year? Consider the long-reaching characteristics of habits. What are a few habits you can add that will make a big difference over the long haul?

> Diet, exercise, financial, and relationship habits can alter your future considerably.

6. What are five habits you’d like to eliminate this year? Bad habits can ruin your life. Which of your negative habits would enhance your life the most if you were able to eliminate them.

7. What are the most important relationships in your life and why? We’re all limited by our personal resources. Good relationships require time and mental effort. It only makes sense to spend those resources on the most important relationships. Also think about past relationships you’d like to renew.

> It’s also useful to determine why those relationships are important. Why do you receive from these relationships that makes them important?

8. Which relationships should you consider ending or minimizing? Just as you’ve accumulated possessions that now clutter your life, you have relationships that need decluttering, too.

> Consider all of your relationships, personal and professional. Which of these no longer serve you?

> Relationships are never static. It’s common for a relationship to change significantly over time.

Are you aware of your past? Take advantage of your past experiences. Examine your past and apply that information to the future. You’ll find that it’s common to make the same mistakes over and over. End the cycle by thoroughly reviewing your past.

Live the Best Year of Your Life

Unless you’ve intentionally put your life in balance, it’s dost likely unbalanced. Having balance among the various parts of your life is necessary for happiness and well-rounded success. Focus on the areas of your life that you would consider low-rated.

If your life is out of balance, you could:

> Be financially successful at the expense of your social life.

> Be successful at your career at the expense of your relationships.

> Be successful at your spiritual interests at the expense of your career.

Without balance, you’ll be suffering in at least one aspect of your life.

This can be tricky. We live in a society that worships those that have accomplished amazing things, often at great expense. While it’s easy to admire these people, many of them are very unhappy. By giving too much attention to any single area of your life, other parts of your life will suffer.

Before deciding that you’d like to a billionaire with a private jet and a set of 6-pack abs, determine the type of lifestyle you’d like to live. Your goals should support the life you’d like to live. Think about a perfect workday, weekend, and holiday. Ideally, your goals will help to make those a reality.

Determine the lifestyle you’d like to live:

1. How do you want to make money? With few exceptions, every adult needs to earn money to survive. The ways of earning money are only limited by your imagination.

> Do you want to make money by being altruistic?

> Do you want a corporate career?

> Do you want to be creative?

> Be a doctor? Astronaut? Real estate investor? Consultant?

> Work with children?

> Work with animals?

2. What working conditions do you prefer? Some people like to work in an office setting. Others like to work at home.

> Day/night?

> With others or alone?

> Required attire?

> Weekends?

> What time do you want to be home each evening?

> Are you willing to travel? Do you want to travel?

> Do you need your own office or is a loft-type setting preferable?

3. How are your finances? You don’t need a 7-figure salary to be happy, but it’s also not easy to be happy with a 4-figure salary. Are you able to maintain your budget? Do you even have a budget? How much debt do you have? Is your income acceptable? Is your money invested wisely for your situation? Will you be able to retire at a reasonable age?

4. Intimate relationships are important. Do you want to be married or single? Play the field or keep things monogamous? What do you need from a romantic partner? Consider the following characteristics a potential romantic partner might have:

> Attractiveness

> Career

> Available free time

> Sense of humor

> Supportiveness

> Tolerance

> Health

> Intelligence

> Kindness

> Interest in having children

> If you currently have a relationship, what is missing? What could be better? Are you satisfied with the relationship as it is?

5. Your free time affects your happiness and satisfaction. How much free time do you have each week? How much of it do you spend with your family? How much time do you spend on hobbies or with friends? How much time do you dedicate to spiritual activities and development?

6. Avoid underestimating the value of good health. Is your diet acceptable? Are you getting enough sleep? Enough exercise? Do you visit your doctor regularly? How is your current health? What do you want to change?

7. Spirituality. Do you meditate or pray regularly? Are you living life according to your beliefs? Are you aware of your beliefs? Do you regularly study spiritual materials?

8. How is your social life? Do you get out of the house as much as you’d like and spend time with people outside of your immediate family? How many friends do you have? How many would you like to have?

If you’re aware of your desired lifestyle, choosing goals becomes easy. Give this careful consideration. There’s no reason to have a goal of being worth $500 million if your ideal lifestyle only requires $2 million. Start with the end in mind and go from there.

Live the Best Year of Your Life

Set Goals That Increase the Level of Balance in Your Life

After assessing your life, you should have a good idea of where your weaknesses lie. Time is a limited resource, so ensure that you’re spending it on the areas of your life that will provide the greatest returns. Seek balance and contentment will follow.

You can have multiple goals covering several areas of your life, but divvy up your time intelligently.

Find balance by choosing your goals intelligently:

1. Create one goal for each area of your life. You can create your own categories, but limit the number to 6-8. Set bigger goals in the areas of your life that are lagging or are the most disagreeable to you.

> It’s not a bad idea to rate each part of your life on a 1-10 scale. Set smaller goals in the higher-rated areas and more significant goals in the lower-rated areas.

> Choose goals that can be achieved within 12 months and are measurable. Being “healthy” isn’t a suitable goal. “Weigh 150 lbs. or less” is suitable.

> Be bold. You can accomplish much more in a year than you currently believe.

2. Determine habits that will support each goal. While we enjoy the stories of those that are successful, the truth is that path to success is quite boring. Losing 50 pounds is exciting, but 300 days of eating well, exercising, and avoiding snacks isn’t that thrilling. But that’s exactly what success is: performing effective habits over an extended period of time.

> Make a list of at least 10 habits that will ensure your success.

> Now choose the three habits that will make the biggest difference. Forget about the rest.

3. Determine the old habits you need to drop. Habits can make your goals easier or more challenging to achieve. Identify your current habits that are obstacles to your success.

> Those habits might be direct obstacles, such as wasting money or eating too much chocolate. Others can be subtler, such as procrastinating, wasting time, or having a negative attitude.

Excess and happiness aren’t well correlated. A balanced life is enjoyable and minimizes the low spots. Having enough money, love, friends, and health is preferable to having an excess in three of them and a lack in the other. Create a solid foundation before attempting to achieve something outrageous.

Live the Best Year of Your Life

Gather Your Resources

For most goals, you’re going to need more than just yourself with your current level of knowledge and expertise. You’ll often require other people, advice, education, and new skills. The internet makes it much easier to find the people and other resources you require.

Get the help you need:

1. Determine what you need to learn. Do you already know everything you need to know in order to be successful? Most importantly, do you know enough to get started? What do you need to learn to take the first step? Remember all the potential resources available to you.

> Internet

> Books

> Online courses

> Local educational facilities

> Clubs

> Audio programs

> YouTube and other videos

> People

2. A mentor can be the most valuable resource. Imagine having access to someone that’s accomplished what you’re trying to accomplish. Unless your goal is highly unusual, someone else has already done it. Seek out these people and ask for assistance.

> You’ve probably had a golf coach, piano teacher, or other type of mentor in the past. It makes sense to have a coach for losing weight or launching an online business, too.

3. Time. Do you have the necessary time available? Some goals don’t require any more time than you’re already spending. Sticking to a budget might actually save time since you won’t be out spending money as much.

> However, most goals require time. Unless you currently have free time to spare, you’ll have to steal time from other activities. Surfing the internet, playing on your phone, and watching TV are the most common time-wasters. You may have to drop some more meaningful activities, too.

> If you can’t make the time for your goals, you might need more inspiring goals.

4. Other resources. If you’re going to be a guitar player, you’ll need a guitar. Do you have everything you need? Computer? Soccer ball? 3-piece suit? Office space? Reliable transportation? Business cards? The ability to cook healthy meals? Ensure you have everything you require.

> You many need financial resources to meet many of your goals. If that’s true, one of your goals might need to be financial in nature.

There are few things you can do completely on your own. You’re likely to need new information, skills, advice, or money to achieve your goals. Identify the key resources you will need and acquire them. Avoid underestimating the value of a great mentor.

Live the Best Year of Your Life

Identify Potential Obstacles

Without any obstacles, achieving your goals and living the best year of your life would be easy. All you’d have to do is make a few decisions. But it’s not that easy. Life is full of obstacles that will derail your efforts if you’re not prepared. Unsuccessful people are easily dissuaded by obstacles.

Identify the obstacles that can stand in your way:

1. People. Interestingly, the people in your life can be the biggest obstacles you’ll face. There are very few people in your life that will be 100% supportive of your efforts. The remainder can directly or indirectly sabotage your efforts.

> Some people will try to help, but do the opposite. Some of the people in your life will have the best of intentions, but hinder your efforts. They may caution you to be realistic or remind you of past failures.

> Your overweight spouse might be threatened by your efforts to lose weight.

> Your brother might be upset if you make more money than he does.

> Keep your eyes open and pay attention. Most people want to see you do well, just not better than they’re doing themselves.

2. You. We all sabotage ourselves on a regular basis. We do so with our thoughts, habits, beliefs, and fears.

> It’s easy to determine if you’re getting in your own way. When you think about your goal, do you feel anything other than excited and enthusiastic? If so, you’re in danger of being your own worst enemy.

> Monitor yourself daily by reviewing your goals and noticing your emotional response. Any negative feelings about achieving your goal must be managed if you want to be successful.

> Your beliefs about yourself can be highly limiting. For example, the belief, “I’m bad with money” will be an obstacle to financial success. If you identify with being a shy person, your social life will have challenges.

3. Momentum. It’s tough to get started. It’s even a law of physics. It takes more energy to get something moving that it takes to keep it moving. Expect resistance early in the process of making changes to your life.

4. Randomness. Life itself presents obstacles. You can argue whether the universe is challenging you or if it’s simply bad luck. However, there’s no disputing that random things will get in the way during your pursuit of your best year ever!

Anticipate the things that can go wrong. Be prepared for the most likely obstacles. Expect resistance while you’re changing your life. Things won’t go smoothly 100% of the time. Get started and strive for consistent progress.

Live the Best Year of Your Life

Do you Have What it Takes?

Attaining your goals isn’t just about having goals and doing the right things. That will work in the short-term, but you won’t have lasting success. It’s necessary to become successful in the areas addressed by your goals. You can’t just change your behavior and expect long- lasting results.

If your goal is to become a millionaire, you must become a person that has the characteristics of a millionaire. It’s necessary to have the belief system of a millionaire and the thought process of a millionaire. You have to be the type of person that takes intelligent risks and manages money well.

Cultivate the attributes that guarantee you’ll achieve your goals:

1. Make a list of attributes that support the achievement of your goals. Take each goal individually and consider the type of person that would achieve that goal. What do you need to become?

> More cautious or less?

> More self-esteem?

> A different attitude?

> A new set of beliefs?

> More outgoing?

> More health-conscious?

> More active?

> More proactive?

2. Create a plan for developing these characteristics. Find the resources you need to become a new version of yourself. Then apply those resources each day to make the necessary changes. When you change yourself, everything in your life will change, too.

> Some people allow their ego to get in the way and declare, “I’m fine just the way I am. I shouldn’t have to change.” You are fine the way you are – if you’re happy with your life! But taking your health more seriously, going back to school, or learning to speak French doesn’t fundamentally change who you are.

> Be brave enough to discover what you’re capable of.

3. Visualize the person you want to become. Once you can believe it, everything else will fall into place. Start convincing yourself that you have the new mindset and attributes by visualizing yourself with them.

Become the person you need to be. It’s important to be open to the idea of changing yourself and not just your behavior. When you change yourself, everything around you changes, too.

Live the Best Year of Your Life

Putting It All Together

You now have all the parts necessary to create a comprehensive plan. Let’s use an example of someone that wants to lose 50 pounds in the next 12 months in a healthy manner. We’ll consider everything we’ve discussed up to this point.

Matt is single, 35 years of age, 250 lbs., and 6 feet tall.

Review the Past

> Matt was a healthy weight until he graduated from college. He then gained a few pounds each year until reaching his present condition.

> He has a history of making poor food choices. In his younger days, these poor choices didn’t affect his weight.

> Matt eats when he’s bored or stressed. It’s his primary coping mechanism. As a result, he keeps a lot of unhealthy comfort food in the house.

> Matt doesn’t mind exercise, but getting out of the house is a challenge for him. He has good intentions, but can’t seem to make it out the door for the drive to the gym.

> Matt views himself as the “funny, chubby guy that everyone likes.”

> Matt knows he’s an all-or-nothing kind of guy. There’s no middle ground. His past attempts at diet and exercise have been extreme, leaving him extremely hungry, sore, and ultimately injured. These attempts have failed spectacularly.

Gather Resources

Matt doesn’t have everything he needs right out of the gate. The world is full of resources, many of them free. Ensure that you have the resources you need to be successful.

1. What does Matt need to learn? Matt remembers the food pyramid from high school, but her realizes that was a while ago. He knows he needs to update his knowledge regarding healthy food choices.

> He also needs to brush up on his knowledge regarding getting into shape. He was a high-school athlete, but he’s not sure how to get into shape from his current starting point.

> Matt knows he needs to learn how to control his impulses regarding his eating habits. He believes that finding other ways to deal with his boredom and stress will make sticking to a healthy eating plan much easier.

2. Matt finds his resources. Matt searches Amazon.com for a few books regarding health, weight loss, exercise, and self-discipline. He chooses a few Kindle books for each topic. Kindle books are less expensive and easy to return if he doesn’t like a book.

> He also finds a few blogs that seem to mirror his situation. The authors started in the same place as Matt and have managed to create the results that Matt desires.

> Matt has a friend that would also like to lose weight. They’ve agreed to hold each other accountable and exercise together.

3. Find a mentor. Matt contacts the blog authors and asks if any of them would like to serve as his mentor. One of them responded positively. Matt also knows a coworker that successfully lost a lot of weight several years ago.

4. Time and other resources. Fortunately, Matt has plenty of time to adopt an exercise plan. He has all the basic resources he needs, but lacks financial resources. A gym membership and fancy food probably aren’t options.

Related Habits

Matt has several bad habits that stand in his way:

1. Poor coping skills. He doesn’t do drugs or drink, but he uses food as an emotional crutch.

2. Unhealthy snacking. Matt eats a large percentage of his calories after dinner while watching TV.

3. High calorie beverages. This is one habit that really makes it difficult to lose weight. Non-calorie drinks take up the same amount of physical space. It’s easy to drink a lot of calories.

4. Little self-discipline. Even the smallest of obstacles can derail Matt’s efforts.

Eliminating these bad habits will be half the battle. In fact, Matt can probably come close to reaching his goal just by eliminating these habits. Dealing with your bad habits may have similar benefits.

It would serve Matt well if he were to develop a few new habits:

1. Coping skills. Matt develops a few ideas for dealing with his anxiety and boredom. When he’s faced with emotional eating, Matt has decided to:

> Meditate for 15 minutes.

> If that doesn’t work, he will then take a 15-minute walk.

> Matt will then call a friend or his accountability partner.

> Matt also decides to take up a hobby to occupy his mind and his time while he’s home alone.

2. Avoid eating after dinner. He knows this will be challenging, but his new coping skills will help. He’s also decided to add fiber to his evening meal to keep himself feeling full. A few glasses of water will help, too.

3. Replacing high-calorie drinks with water or other non-caloric drinks. He knows this will make a huge difference. He realizes that he might not have to cut his food intake very much if he can eliminate calories from his beverages.

4. Research self-discipline issues. He decides to do one thing each day that he doesn’t feel like doing. He knows he needs to learn how to ignore his negative feelings and take action any way. The books have a detailed program for increasing his self-discipline and Matt schedules this activity into his life.

5. Make exercise a daily habit. Exercise will help with his hunger and speed his progress.

6. Make wiser food choices. Matt decides to implement a new decision process at meal times. He will now ask himself a series of questions:

> Am I actually hungry? If not, he will use his new coping strategies.

> Will this food take me further or closer to my weight-loss goal?

> Matt will also avoid purchasing any unhealthy foods. He knows that if it’s in the house, it will eventually be eaten.

7. Review his goal and his progress each day. Matt revisits his goal in the morning and the evening. He also weighs himself each day. He knows that his weight can fluctuate from day to day, so he takes the average weight for the week to track his progress.

It’s okay to start slowly. A few smaller changes can provide sufficient results in the early stages.

Potential Obstacles

Matt identifies his potential obstacles:

1. Matt’s mom. Matt lives close to his mom, whom has always encouraged him to eat. His mom thinks men should be well-fed and look that way. He knows that she will start nagging him as soon as he loses 10 pounds.

> Matt knows he needs to grow up and stop worrying about his mother’s opinion. He pays for one hour of counseling and receives several tips for dealing with her effectively while preserving the relationship.

2. His finances. Matt doesn’t have a lot of money to spend on losing weight, but realizes that he will be spending less money on food and beverages. He’s confident he can overcome this obstacle without any problems.

3. His friends. Matt’s friends love to go out and eat cheeseburgers, chicken wings, and other traditional pub food. His friends will give him some good- natured ribbing and tempt him with his favorite foods.

> Matt knows that his friends eat first, and then spend time talking. He decides to eat at home, show up late, and then order a diet soda. He can still spend time with his friends socializing while avoiding temptation.

Personal Attributes

Matt creates a list of personal attributes that will facilitate reaching his goal:

1. Patience. Losing 50 pounds will take time. To reach his goal in a year, he must average one pound of weight loss per week.

2. Persistence. While the work won’t be too difficult, the changes won’t be enjoyable in the beginning. Persistence will be an important quality.

3. Having an emphasis on health, diet, and exercise. People that are lean, fit, and healthy emphasize these things. When making decisions, these items are always in the back of their minds.

Overall Plan

Matt knows that losing one pound each week should be easy, especially for someone of his weight. Only small changes are required to meet his one-pound per week goal. He doesn’t need to make any drastic changes.

For example, cutting out a couple of sugared drinks each day and taking a leisurely 15-minute walk each night would be sufficient to lose a pound each week for the next several weeks. When those changes stop working, it’s time to add another change or two. Small habit changes can be enough to make continuous progress. Avoid believing that painful change is required.

With enough patience and persistence, even large goals can be achieved comfortably.

Live the Best Year of Your Life

Conclusion

There’s a lot to do to create the best year of your life. But none of it is particularly challenging. Determine the lifestyle that would appeal to you most. This is the starting point. Then look to your past for clues about yourself and your mistakes. What do you do well? Where do you have challenges? What are the changes you need to make?

Gather the necessary resources and make small changes to your habits. Evaluate your progress and go from there. Remain aware that you’ll need to make some personal changes. Your current collection of attitudes, beliefs, and knowledge have led to your current situation. You must change yourself to seek lasting change in your life.

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How to Fight Negative Thoughts and Feelings

What is the Secret to Living a Meaningful and Impactful Life?

What is the Secret to Living a Meaningful and Impactful Life?

From time to time, several of us find ourselves in a motivational slump that we have to work hard to get out of. Sometimes, it feels like a continuous cycle where we are motivated for a period of time, suddenly fall out of motivation, and then have to build things back up again.

More often than not, experience tells us that this drop in motivation is caused by an over-extension of oneself, an in inability to say no, and a lack of consistent effort over a long period of time. We would rather focus on instant gratification, rather than long term success.

The truth to the ever-present problem of finding ways to stay inspired is never as simple as it seems. It’s as though there is always a pulsation of opposite forces pulling us away from periods of intense focus on self-improvement and pushing us in the opposite direction of living life on the outpoint, stuck in a rut and running on empty.

And for whatever reason, this always seems to be the case when your life has gotten out of control. Maybe you’re working long hours and have lost your sense of self. Perhaps you focus on everyone else and never take time to be alone. Whatever the case may be, setting aside time to focus on your own goals and dreams is a worthwhile endeavor that should be practiced on a frequent basis.

Becoming a better version of yourself is the main goal of self-improvement—to improve in your job, your business, your relationships. Whatever area of your life you’re working on, that’s part of growing as a person. You have to constantly look at what you can improve and have the awareness to know what needs to be done to do it.

A large part of learning to live a meaningful and impactful life is putting in the time each and every day to focus on your own self and your own personal needs. It begins with sitting down and taking the time to look at yourself in the mirror and ask these 10 simple, but very powerful questions:

  1. Is this the best that I can do right now based on my current life circumstance?
  2. What do I need to let go of from the past to learn to live in the present, and am I planning for the future without attachment or expectations?
  3. What areas of my life can I make improvements in, and what do I need to do to implement the necessary changes and take the required steps to advance my life?
  4. Am I taking care of myself first, and then taking care of my immediate families’ needs second, before all other obligations including work, social, extended family, and community responsibilities?
  5. How can I make the world around me better?
  6. What can I remove from my life that is no longer serving me positively?
  7. Is this worth my time, energy, and effort, and do I need to say no more often?
  8. What clutter can I remove?
  9. Who or What is stealing my time and how can I make changes going forward to prevent theft from my life?
  10. Am I living my ideal life, and if not, what do I need to do to move forward and achieve my goals and live my dream life with purpose?

Self-improvement is the improvement of one’s knowledge, status, or character by one’s own efforts. It’s the quest to make ourselves better in any and every facet of life.

Have you ever seen or heard the term, “the struggle is real?”? Life distracts you. It interrupts you. Your energy wanes, especially on mornings after late nights. Any number of things get in the way of the work you need to do.

People fail often from want of perseverance, rather than from want of talent. Effort is everything. Everything worth doing in life is an effort and it’s that effort that brings the later rewards of accomplishment. Continuous self-development should be focused on areas of your life that you want to improve.

Unless we persistently seek our goal, we can hope for no reward. When we become exhausted, disheartened, and give over our efforts; if we are appalled by obstacles and faint on account of the embarrassments thrown in our way; if we pine for ease and withdraw, it shows that we have no true attachment to the cause. The path of duty is often found to be the path of difficulty and discouragement.

Efforts are often misunderstood and ill-requited; plans are ridiculed, motives misrepresented, hopes of success treated as visionary and absurd, and yet, still the conscientious, right-minded people of determination proceed as they act from principle, not impulse. Our great want is confessedly claiming power as impulse and that spasms are common. Make indomitable perseverance your bosom friend in your pursuit; it always ensures ultimate success.

The most effective way of finding out how to get better is to ask the people around you to make a list of what you’re best at and where you could make improvements.

Take the list of improvements and work on them one by one.

  1. Start Your Day with a Fresh & Lively Morning: Every day begins with a morning, and if your morning is lazy and lifeless, you can’t expect to spend the rest of the day full of energy. Therefore, you must try to wake up in the morning as early as possible and have a breakfast full of nutrition. This will help you stay fully energetic throughout the day and, if you could include some exercises in your regular morning life, this would be even more beneficial. If you live alone, you need to depend upon yourself, but if you are living with other family members, you can also advise them to be part of a healthy, happy, and fresh morning.
  2. Accepting the Bitter Truth of Life That You Can’t Change: You may have experienced some situations in your life which are difficult to forget and let go of. However, if you accept them as they are, you will be able to overcome them and move forward in your life rather than being a victim of nightmares. Accepting things will allow you to find the solution, or else you will never be able to get rid of them.
  3. Expect to accomplish or achieve: While many believe that most of the individuals who are winning in this world are really smarter than they are. But it is not a fact. The real trick here is to anticipate winning earlier than it has still happened. This method does not stress sufficiently how essential this is, because your mindset includes a powerful effect on not or whether you will reach your self-improvement goals and dreams. Note that, it never says you require self-improvement skills to achieve, because the truth of the matter is possessing a determined and bold hope goes more than really having the effective knowledge or skills. It will really come with persistence and conviction.
  4. Write specific goals and actions plan: The simple effort of putting your pen to a piece of paper includes a theatrical effect on easily clarifying your aid and career goals with the expectation you noticed above. The habit or activity of writing goals is really mandatory when you wish to achieve your self-improvement goals very soon. Dreaming is an excellent thing and doing is another important thing. Every written objective should direct you to the distinctive long-term objective and wonderful life. This striking and remarkable idea helps you to develop your skills and personality in an outstanding manner. Along with this, it also plays a vital in the self-improvement skills process, so you can follow it without any hesitation.
  5. Quit your bad habits: It is really essential to find out your bad habits before leaving it. Are there some bad habits or activities you can drop? Not exercising? Slouching? Smoking? Nail biting? Oversleeping? Here are several guidelines regarding how to quit your bad habits. Stopping your bad habit is an essential process because it helps you in self-improvement tips. Every habit change really gives you a new possibility. You can remember the healthy benefits you achieve when you leave smoking. When you completely stop your smoking habit, you will amazingly raise your individual pocket money. The striking benefit surely motivates you to begin saving. Your habit change not only brings you some benefits but also helps you to improve your personality. In order to obtain the essential advantage, you can try to find out all your bad habits and stop it immediately. This extraordinary effort helps you to reach your personality development goal very soon.
  6. Take responsibility for what happens in your life: Blaming others is giving your power to them. You become the effect of other people’s actions and behavior unable to change things. When you are the cause, you can control the outcome. Is it not? Your success in life lies in your ability to adapt and adjust to whatever life throws at you. Taking responsibility for what happens in your life gives you options and insight into how is best for you to move ahead.
  7. Don’t fear your failure and take an essential break to have more fun: Failure is a stepping stone to success” is a well-known quote. Instead, redefine your failure as a feedback & as an accepted portion of your successful life. Some people fail once, they lose their motivation. Instead, you should observe your mistakes properly and try to conquer it in your next attempt, because repeated efforts allow you to achieve success within the short time duration. Your life is an excellent and longtime journey, so you

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I am a Board Certified Life Coach, a Board Certified Health Coach, and a teacher of Mindfulness Living who helps people unlock their potential and live life on Purpose

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How to Fight Negative Thoughts and Feelings

Living Without Fear

Living Without Fear

We live in an era of limitless possibilities; one where any person can live the life they desire to. And yet, one of life’s sharpest paradoxes remains the fact that your brightest future centers on your ability to overcome your limiting beliefs

At the commencement of each new year, I am frequently asked by many students, “how can I achieve my goals and learn to live a mindful and spiritually fulfilled life?” In other words, they want to learn how they can make lasting changes and find true balance within their lives.

Despite having noble intentions, many individuals live their lives on autopilot; not fully experiencing themselves in the world. And while activities like yoga, exercise, and meditation help, most people find it difficult to remain focused on what’s possible when confronted with the trials and demands of our fast-paced and ever-evolving society.

Take a minute to imagine yourself in a tranquil atmosphere, separated from all the distractions you encounter – then, ask yourself: “What would I do if I were not afraid?”

Of those who succeed in making resolutions, many also fail. However, many fail before they give success a chance, mostly out of fear. Some are afraid of failure, while others are afraid of success. Regardless of the source, fear immobilizes too many and prevents us from achieving what we desire and are capable of.

It is human nature to avoid emotions that scare us. Who wants to walk directly into what promises to be a painful experience? Of all the negative emotions that can reduce your capacity for attracting what you desire, fear is one of the most potent. Are you anxious, stressed, or frightened when you think about everything that could go wrong in life?

We all doubt whether or not we are doing enough, making enough money, or if we are going to be “successful” enough. I know this personally, as I’ve devoted long periods of my life to a continuous state of fear and self-doubt. I questioned my abilities to the point that I was making my decisions based on what others desired of me, not what I aspired for myself.

The good news is that once you face your fears – and give the boogeyman air – rather than shove your fears into a distant compartment of your brain, it begins to lose the ability to rule you and dictate your decisions.

Everyone struggles with uncertainty at some point in their life, even successful people. A little self-doubt is normal and healthy. It prevents a person from crossing that fine line between self-confidence and hubris. However, the difference between normal apprehension and people who live in fear is the fact that a highly successful person does not let self-doubt derail them from what they set out to accomplish.

I look at self-doubt as just a temporary condition.

If you’re contemplating making a big change, I say: do it. The fear won’t kill you, even if it feels like it might because the consequences of not making that leap might be a lifetime of regrets. Really, what’s the worst that can happen?

Remember, transitions can be challenging, but this is your life. Remain committed to the process of self-discovery and be open to exploring your passions in healthy, honest ways. Once you begin to see fear as an opportunity rather than a hindrance, you will create fewer limitations for yourself, and the universe will guide and support you along the way!

Fear holds you back and keeps you focused on the idea of lack, while love fills you with positivity and heightens your energy vibrations in a way that makes your abilities much more powerful.

Here are some things you can start doing immediately if you want to learn how to transform fear into love.

  1. Embrace and Master Your Emotions: It’s important to understand that transforming fear into love isn’t about repressing or denying the truth of your feelings.
  2. Identify Your Fears: Are there any obstacles in your life that you know you need to confront, but have been avoiding?
  3. Demystify Your Fears: Much of fears power comes from the fact that it’s often poorly understood. For example, think about times you’ve experienced crawling unease, a pounding heart, or fear of failure without really having a grasp on exactly what frightens you or why.
  4. Give Fear a Shape: Ask yourself what you are most afraid of. What factors contribute to your fear, what triggers it, and what gives it more power over you? In addition, consider the ways in which your fears have been getting in the way of your happiness and success.
  5. Don’t forget: your circumstances keep changing all the time! Don’t live in the past. Just because something could not happen last year, doesn’t mean that it won’t happen this year.
  6. Visualize Your Dream Life. If not for other people’s judgments and expectations, what would you be doing with your life that you feel inhibited from doing now? Make a list of as many things as you can think of – big or small – that you would do if you weren’t afraid.
  7. Break It Down: Once you become consciously aware of your authentic self, you can begin to confront the areas of your life that are not in alignment with your truth.
  8. Celebrate Your Milestones: Each time you successfully overcome a meaningful obstacle, take the time to share your accomplishment with others. Plan a small party or social outing – whatever feels appropriate. It is important to celebrate your achievements with the people you love. Not only will celebrating your achievements help to strengthen your support network, but it will also serve as inspiration as you strive to achieve future endeavors.

What’s your level of emotional intelligence?

Find out if your emotional intelligence is helping or hindering your growth! .

I am a Board Certified Life Coach, a Board Certified Health Coach, and a teacher of Mindfulness Living who helps people unlock their potential and live life on Purpose

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How to Fight Negative Thoughts and Feelings

Observing the practice of Ahimsa

Observing the practice of Ahimsa

Observing the practice of Ahimsa (non-violence), the first Yama of Patanjali Yoga Sutras, involves refraining from the intention of causing physical and psychological pain to any living being, and the conscious integration of compassion into all aspects of daily life. Ahimsa is about the intent, rather than the deed itself. It is an attitude of universal compassion.

Ahimsa isn’t simply the practice of refraining from vehement words or violent actions, it’s also about abstaining from harmful thoughts. It is the total and complete absence of violence from one’s mind, body, and spirit.

Abstaining from violent and harmful actions is easy when you’re comfortable and secure, but freeing yourself from harmful thought patterns presents a mountain that every single one of us is equipped to climb, yet few of us have the courage and confidence to do so.

In understanding just how non-violence can manifest itself in our lives, we must first realize how our daily actions and responses encompass elements of harmfulness. More often than not, this happens against ourselves. Our thoughts contain negative responses like disappointment, resentment, or guilt.

If we don’t consistently remove the thoughts of negativity, of self-harm, and of self-criticism, those thoughts begin to grow and multiply. Rather than celebrating the gift of who we are, we start to judge, compare, and criticize ourselves and others. Negative thoughts can slowly become translated into words and actions.

If you are consistently critical of yourself, it is inevitable that you will also be critical of others. If the only thoughts going through your head are negative, there is a minimal chance that you are sending positive energy into the world. Coming from the space of accepting and appreciating the innate beauty, wholeness, and imperfect perfectness in ourselves and people around us will strengthen the roots of Ahimsa in us.

Ahimsa starts with the practice of forgiving someone for something that they’ve done against you, or forgiving yourself for something you’ve done. The mind is the most potent tool in our possession. Our thoughts and emotions play such a big role in our overall well-being. Finding your inner peace through Ahimsa will, in turn, allow us to find peace in our interactions with others.

Ways to Practice Ahimsa

  1. Practice mindful eating.
  2. Allow yourself to receive. You may think that by always giving, you are ensuring non-harm and opening generosity to others.
  3. See through, not with, the eye.
  4. Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle that you may not be aware of.
  5. Cultivate the seeds of positive and loving thoughts.
  6. Care for Mother Earth and our ecosystem.
  7. Resolve conflicts through peaceful measures.

We can understand Ahimsa as maintaining mindful of thoughts. Thoughts naturally move into and out of our minds. The thoughts themselves don’t necessarily cause harm. However, holding onto thoughts and letting them repeat again and again in your mind is what eventually turns into actions or words of violence. Start to practice simply observing your thoughts instead of reacting to them. When you allow yourself to acknowledge and observe, you’ll find that your thoughts slip from your awareness just as easily as they come in.

Ahimsa is complicated, but it can also be as easy as riding a bike instead of driving a car. Ahimsa is looking in the mirror and not thinking that you look fat in that outfit (and not telling your sister that she looks fat in hers). Ahimsa is as easy as remembering that all beings everywhere have the right to be happy and free. Ahimsa is mindfulness. Ahimsa is an idea that can grow into a reality if we allow it to.

That’s where our non-violent thoughts come in. When we think lovingly, these thoughts trigger the release of dopamine in the body. Dopamine is the chemical that makes you feel good and relaxed. Unlike cortisol, dopamine brings strength to the immune system. It can even cure illness. Those who think of themselves as optimists tend to have stronger immune systems and recover faster from illnesses and injuries. Optimists may even live longer than those who think of themselves as pessimists.

The practice of Ahimsa is a work in progress and let us not expect drastic changes over night. It takes time to make new habits and behaviors. Let us take one day at a time and sooner or later, we will see that we are established in Ahimsa. A strong intention and loving patience will make it happen.

How to Practice Ahimsa

  1. Non-violence towards other living beings: This one can be a bit tricky, and definitely uses a great deal of brain power to decipher on a daily basis. The first step towards this one is simply becoming aware; so get out there, read voraciously about the harmful things that are being done to animals and humans (think sweat-shops and child slaves), and then see if you can make small changes to minimize the damage that your life on this planet is causing.
  2. Non-violence towards the planet This is another dangerous minefield filled with more information than you can poke a stick at, but the simplest and most effective way to be kinder to the planet is so mind-blowingly simple – just buy less crap! Who has a cupboard filled with things they never use? A wardrobe filled with clothes they rarely wear? That infamous second drawer in the kitchen filled with all kinds of utensils you never use? If you don’t LOVE it, and you don’t NEED it (want is not enough), then don’t buy it! Simple.
  3. Non-violence in your thoughts: Learning how to not think mean thoughts towards others is one thing you can do to bring non-violence into your life. It’s pretty darn hard, but achievable if you can try and remember that everyone just wants to be happy. Much harder than this, is if you’re anything like me (and 99.99% of humans on the planet), in which case I can almost guarantee that your violent thoughts are more often than not directed towards yourself. The person in your life that you are the cruelest to, the hardest on, and the least compassionate towards is probably yourself. We tell ourselves that we aren’t good enough, aren’t smart enough, aren’t good looking enough and aren’t worthy enough, etc. So here’s what you can do: start slowly. Start by telling yourself that you love yourself each morning – maybe into the mirror, oy maybe by giving yourself a big hug at the same time. Write a list of your best qualities, your best features, and read over these daily. Slowly (but surely) these positive thoughts will begin to become second nature, and it will be easier to dismiss your unkind thoughts. Learning how to be non-violent towards yourself in your thoughts is a life-long journey, but one which gives us the largest reward of all – happiness. Practicing Ahimsa towards yourself requires work and time and a whole lot of patience, but I promise you that it’s the best change you will ever make in your life!

What’s your level of emotional intelligence?

Find out if your emotional intelligence is helping or hindering your growth! .

I am a Board Certified Life Coach, a Board Certified Health Coach, and a teacher of Mindfulness Living who helps people unlock their potential and live life on Purpose

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How to Fight Negative Thoughts and Feelings

The Value of A Growth Mindset

The Value of A Growth Mindset

“Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn.”- Benjamin Franklin

Every single person has a yearning to be prosperous and find lasting happiness. As a young person, we ask ourselves questions throughout our journey to success and happiness.

  • Who are we? Beyond being physical beings in a material world, we are all uniquely special spiritual beings, who are here for a reason.
  • Why are we here? Beyond being here to survive, we are creators who are here to live, expand, and realize our full potential. Our hearts have the access to inner wisdom, the ability to dream (follow our hearts), and create a wonderful life.
  • Where are we going? Beyond meeting our physical and material needs, each of us has something special to offer the world. We’re here with a higher purpose, to make a difference.

These inquiries, and many more similar questions, provide us with the motivation to learn and grow, but at some point in our busy lives, we become preoccupied; we stop asking these powerful questions and begin to live our lives on autopilot. The harsh truth is, when we stop asking these questions, we stop growing and we begin to die.

As conscious people, learning to Live Life on Purpose. We need to constantly develop ourselves intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually. We grow and change physically as we develop from infancy to adulthood and old age. We grow and change emotionally with every experience, and we grow intellectually as we respond to events within the world around us.

Why is it important to always learn and mature as an individual? We’ve all made mistakes throughout our lives that haven’t precisely put us in the best light; perhaps mistreating a person in a past relationship or telling a little white lie to get out of trouble for a mistake made at work. Chances are, however, you have undoubtedly felt a small amount of guilt and grew because of these experiences.

Anything that you want to remain in your life, your money, your health, your relationship, your happiness, love, must be cultivated, developed, and expanded. Otherwise, it will degenerate. Some people satisfy the need to grow by working out physically or by reading books. Others need to study and learn constantly in order to feel as though they are truly growing.

Lifelong learning can be socially invigorating, and it can also improve memory and cognitive abilities. There are two main reasons for learning throughout life: for personal development and for professional development. These reasons may not necessarily be distinct as personal development can improve your employment opportunities and professional development can enable personal growth.

Your ability to expand your mind and strive for lifelong learning is critical to your success. By dedicating yourself to learning, you can get ahead in every aspect of your life. All it takes is a commitment. When you think about the things you do every day, you probably wouldn’t put, “learning new things” on the list. Living busy and hectic lifestyles makes it difficult to even think about learning new things and trying something new, but you could be missing out tremendously, both personally and professionally.

“Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young.” ­­­­­­ – Henry Ford

Growth learning helps you expand your mind. You’re acquiring information that you didn’t have previously, and that enables you to do things that you could not have done prior. Some of the very best thinkers in the world today are producing some of the very best material and ideas that you can use for continuous education and mind expansion.

Learning widens your horizons, enhances your knowledge, keeps you up to date with the current world. Learning is essential to our existence. Just like food nourishes our bodies, information and continued learning nourishes our minds

An individual is not born lucky, but rather possesses the habit of personal development; continuously learning new skills to achieve the desired result in life. Truthfully, a person may not always achieve their vision in life, but he or she will experience a richer and more rewarding life when dedicated to regularly pursuing new goals and learning new skills. Making that commitment to personal development is the first step on the path towards personal fulfillment.

Growth is about making a personal investment in one’s self and improving his or her skill set in order to manage life effectively and provide value to the community. Personal development allows a person to be proactive. Setting goals that are time-sensitive causes a person to achieve their dreams in life. Luck happens when hard work meets opportunity. This is why it is so important to try new things and push yourself out of your comfort zone. The potential benefits are really huge and to be honest, there is nothing to lose. So, you should start today and learn something new!

The goal of personal growth is to find balance between living your life and learning new skills and tools to be your best self. Learning helps you expand your mind, and as you begin to acquire information that you did not have before, you can begin to do things that you could not have done before. Knowledge is the primary source of value in our world today, and your ability to expand your mind and devote yourself to lifelong learning is the key to breaking any success barriers.

Ways to Practice a Growth Mindset

  1. Listen to audio. Many of us have a favorite radio station and enjoy listening to music. Try adding just 30 minutes of educational audio a day to leave you feeling strong and inspired.
  2. Read books. In this day and age of modern technology, it may seem like books have become lost or forgotten. “The Alchemist” by Pablo Coelho and “The Way of the Peaceful Warrior” by Dan Millman are books that share journeys of personal development through fictional stories and are available in audio formats as well.
  3. Find a mentor. Look for someone who inspires you and is already where you want to be in life. If you are able to, don’t be afraid to talk with them, share your aspirations, and even ask them questions.
  4. Notice behavior patterns. We are all creatures of habit. Some of these habits are helpful and others are not. It’s good to be aware of your habits, so that you can actively weaken the ones you don’t want and strengthen the ones you do want.
  5. Keep track of your self-reflection. Start a journal where you record your observations and monitor your personal growth. This will help you when looking back at your year to remind yourself of where you’ve been and where you want to go.
  6. Get out of your comfort zone. Resting on your laurels means that you will not grow. Get out of your comfort zone, put yourself out there, take risks and aim to do something different, such as learning a new skill or hobby.
  7. Create a plan and a list of goals. Where do you see yourself in 1/2/3/5/8/10 years’ time? If you know your ambitions, write them down so that you have a clear view of the goals you would like to achieve.
  8. Learn new skills. Learning doesn’t end when you finish school. Learning is a lifelong journey. Take up a new hobby, whether it’s crafting, designing, coding, painting, learning to play a musical instrument, or taking up a new sport. Adding more strings to your bow is quite impressive, and it shows that you are a well-rounded person.

What’s your level of emotional intelligence?

Find out if your emotional intelligence is helping or hindering your growth! .

I am a Board Certified Life Coach, a Board Certified Health Coach, and a teacher of Mindfulness Living who helps people unlock their potential and live life on Purpose

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How to Fight Negative Thoughts and Feelings

The Secrets to Live a Successful Life

The Secrets to Live a Successful Life

Have you ever wondered about how some people are able to achieve massive amounts of success in their field, while others work just as hard, but achieve very little? The not-so-secret truth, is that individuals who show up on a regular and consistent basis are often the ones who accomplish something worthwhile in life. Life distracts you – it interrupts you. A large part of success comes from putting the right amount of time in, and on a daily basis. It comes from keeping up with the daily grind. The truth is, inspiration and success come from your starting point. Luck and success happen when hard work and consistent effort meet opportunities.

Like it or not, consistency is essential if you want to make any significant change in your life. Waking up every day and striving to do your best without being attached to the outcome, is an indispensable skill; one that you could use to achieve your goals, and live your life with purpose. The arduous part, is to remain focused on your goals and dreams, especially when there are no short-term payoffs. It is easy enough to get distracted by life. List most of us, you skip working on your goals and dreams on the days you don’t feel your best and often choose to focus on painless distractions.

One of the fundamental distinctions between successful people and unsuccessful people, is that successful individuals arrive and try, even when they would rather focus on easy, mindless tasks for the sake of being busy in life. They say that practice makes you perfect, but practice simply makes you a practitioner. Rather, it is perfect practice that makes you perfect. Perfection in practice depends on the three main elements: first, you have to practice for a long period of time; second, your practice must not be interrupted—you must do it regularly; and third, you must do your practice with love and respect.

5 Ways To Help You Achieve Your Goals And Dreams Through Consistent Practice

  1. Get your “why” clear: know your vision – having a compelling reason for why you do something will help you keep going.
  2. Pick one project at a time: do not take on multiple tasks at the same time, pick one thing, focus on it, and achieve the results you want before moving on to something new.
  3. Schedule your priorities: plan your activities by priority and stick to them. As you knock the items off your list, your resolve gets stronger and motivates you to keep moving further.
  4. Ignore the voice: ignore the voice that tells you to skip the things that are important. This is probably the most difficult one, but as you do more of this, it’ll get easier.
  5. Accept your slipups: it’s ok if you miss something, don’t beat yourself about it too much. Consistently move forward and get back on track by shifting your focus to the next task.

Consistency commands respect and honor on your part. It demands that you commit yourself to a sustained effort of action over the long-term. This essentially means that you keep your promise to yourself and to others that you will follow through with what you set out to do consistently over a period of time, right up until the moment your objectives are achieved. As such, consistency is all about your ability to be dependable, reliable, and responsible for all your choices, decisions, and actions.

Consistency is about building small, empowering habits and rituals that you partake in every single day that keep you focused on your highest priorities and goals. Therefore, it essentially comes down to your ability to hold yourself accountable for the daily choices you make with no excuses and no complaints. You, and you alone, are accountable for what you do and what you fail to do. All responsibility lies solely in your hands.

Consistency means to focus on the present moment, while simultaneously maintaining a long-term vision of the future that helps you measure your results and the impact of your daily actions. With this regular feedback in your hands, you are better able to learn from your failures and mistakes to help you effectively alter your course of action where required

And the best part, is that the longer you remain consistent, the better able you’ll be to see just how far you’ve come. If you’ve ever been in a situation where you haven’t seen a noticeable change in the direction you want, it’s because you haven’t been consistent long enough or you’ve been consistently going in the wrong direction. Make sure that you’re following the right course and you keep at it. From there, your success is bound to follow, as long as you never quit.

If you take consistent action towards your goals every day, where do you see yourself in three months?

6 Ways to Develop More Consistent habits

  1. Use a morning ritual. This is perhaps the most powerful tip I have found so far in this area. Simply set up a routine in the morning that you do as soon as you wake up; this works so well because what you do early in the day often sets the context for the rest of your day to follow. As humans, we have a strong tendency to want to be consistent with what we have done before. That’s one big reason why a bad start often leads to a bad day and a good start often leads to a good day.
  2. Do things, even if you don’t feel like it. Your inner voice and feelings can be disregarded if you like. Remember, you can do whatever you want to do anyway.
  3. Don’t hurt yourself. Whatever you do throughout your day sends signals back to yourself about what kind of person you are. Do the right thing – like being effective, kind, or going to the gym to feel good. If you get lazy, negative, or just plain mean, you’ll tend to feel worse after a while. You don’t get away, there is no escaping yourself. And there is always a price to pay. Use these points as powerful motivators to become a better person.
  4. Focus on and take responsibility for the process, not the potential results. If you focus on the process, you will be a lot more relaxed and prone to continue, than if you stare yourself blind on the potential results that never come as quickly as you want to.
  5. Find and do what you love or like to do. It is always easier to stick with the program if you love, or at least like, what you are doing every week. So, experiment and find what suits you best.
  6. Hold yourself accountable, with help – we all plateau. It’s frustrating, but also a normal part of life. The key to bursting through ceilings, be it mental, physical, or financial, is to hold yourself accountable. Now, that doesn’t mean to hold yourself accountable for doing it all, but hold yourself accountable for getting help. Regardless of the form help takes, make it a priority to get some this year. You’ll be surprised by how much further and faster a little help can take you as you struggle to stay consistent and realize your dreams.

What’s your level of emotional intelligence?

Find out if your emotional intelligence is helping or hindering your growth! .

I am a Board Certified Life Coach, a Board Certified Health Coach, and a teacher of Mindfulness Living who helps people unlock their potential and live life on Purpose

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How to Fight Negative Thoughts and Feelings