Life comes with challenges. How you handle challenges says a lot about your life. Big challenges can be especially intimidating.

Many people feel overwhelmed when faced with adversity, but this is unnecessary. All challenges, both big and small, can be handled with the same basic strategy.

When you feel confident that you can handle any challenge, you have more opportunities available to you.

Use this process to deal with the challenges in your life proactively:

1. Set a goal. Goals are helpful in many situations, including overcoming a big challenge. If you want to be successful, set a goal. Setting a goal accomplishes several things:

– It focuses your time and attention on a solution, rather than putting your attention on the problem.

– It makes it clearer how you should be spending you time.

– It gives you the best chance to overcome your big challenge.

– It makes you feel like you have some control over your life.

– If there’s nothing you can do about the challenge you’re facing, avoid spending any time or energy on it. Work on something else instead.

2. Avoid wasting time. If you have a big challenge in your life, you can’t afford to waste your time on silly things. Identify you biggest time-wasters and commit to spending that time on your solution instead. You might find that overcoming your challenge wasn’t as difficult as you thought it would be.

3. Create a plan. You have a goal, and you’re not going to waste time. So, now you need a plan that will help you accomplish your solution.

– What has to happen immediately before you accomplish your goal? Keep working back until you reach an action you can take today. Now, all you have to do is perform that action. What could be simpler?

– Just keep going like this, step by step, to make a successful plan.

4. Get help. The more resources you can utilize to make your solution a reality, the better the odds of success. It will also speed up the process greatly. Get whatever help you can. Now isn’t the time to be bashful. You can always repay the favor at a later date.

5. Visualize success. Visualization makes your objective clear. It also gives you a boost of confidence and keeps you focused. See yourself successfully overcoming this challenge. Visualize a few times each day.

6. Persevere. If you have a plan, you’re working your plan, and you’re not wasting time, the only thing left to do is hang in there. There’s not much you can’t accomplish if don’t give up. Keep working your plan and persevere!

7. Determine how to avoid a similar situation. If the treads came off your tires, now you know to replace your tires sooner. If your ex-boyfriend stole all of your money, you know that you need to protect your finances better.

– Consider how this challenge came to be, and how you can prevent it from happening again. It would be a shame to go through all of this grief and not learn from it. Use your challenges to ultimately become more capable.

– Just be sure to solve your challenge before taking this last step. Focus on your solution first. Worry about prevention later.

The bigger your goals and aspirations, the bigger the challenges you’ll face. It’s important to have a strategy for dealing with challenges when they arise.

The worst thing you can do is nothing. If there’s a solution, it’s important to actively pursue it rather than sitting around worrying. Your success is largely determined by your ability to overcome challenges.

If you’re facing a big challenge, do what you can to find a solution. Avoid the tendency to sit around and worry about the situation. Be solution-focused!

It’s common the hear people talk about going, “monk mode.” What does this mean?

How does a Buddhist monk live? Their entire life is about understanding how the mind works and gaining enlightenment. To that end, they give up just about everything else: money, entertainment, women, and so on. They have zero distractions to keep them from their purpose.

A more relatable example might be that of a serious writer. She might put herself in a cabin in the woods with nothing other than a word processor, some food, and a bed. She avoids contact with most people and focuses 100% on writing.

You can do the same thing on a more or less temporary basis. You can focus on one aspect of your life and largely ignore the rest for a short time.

Choose a focus:

1. Health. Maybe you want to lose a few pounds, heal from childhood trauma, or clean up your diet.

2. Fitness. Maybe you want to focus on getting in the best shape of your life. You might want to see your abs, bench press twice your bodyweight, and run a 10K in under 48 minutes.

3. Finances. Most of us could use a little more money. You can choose to temporarily focus your life on maximizing your income and minimizing your expenses.

4. Spirituality. Education, meditation, and prayer might be just what you need to take your life to the next level.

5. Finding a partner. What would happen if you made finding a life partner your primary focus?

6. Writing a book. Have you always dreamed of writing? This could be your chance!

These are just a few possibilities. You might want to focus on the piano, perfect your oil painting, work on your communication skills, or build an online business.

What is so important to you that you’re willing to put the rest of your life on the back burner for a while?

Use these tips to go monk mode:

1. Eliminate as much as possible. What are you willing to give up? What do you need to give up in order to maximize your results?

* Irrelevant social interaction. You don’t have to cut yourself off completely, but it would be helpful to come close. Most of the interactions you have with others are of minimal value and waste time.

* Meaningless distractions. TV, internet, smartphone, reading fiction, reading non-fiction that isn’t related to your area of focus – these are a good start. How do you like to waste time?

* Anything that doesn’t contribute to progress in your area of interest. Remember, in a perfect monk mode world, you’d do little other than eat, sleep, and improve in your area of focus.

2. Define the most effective ways to spend your time. Now that you’ve created a lot of time for yourself, you have to know how to spend that time wisely.

* What are the most important actions you can take? How can you best implement them into your life?

* What information do you need? A mentor? A new book? Ensure that you know enough to make wise choices.

3. Expect to be uncomfortable. If you’re used to meeting the same set of friends for nachos and beer twice a week, it will be awkward to end that practice. If you numb yourself with TV every evening, it will be uncomfortable to no longer have that crutch. Imagine living like a real monk.

You know that you’re smart and capable. The biggest challenge you have is that your time and focus are too scattered. By going monk mode, you can put all of your resources toward mastering one aspect of your life.

What do you want to master?

Life is full of bumps in the road. Construction holds up traffic on your way to work. Your child loses their homework folder about once a month, and your boss blames you for a decision they made.

Sometimes you can change your circumstances. More often, you’ll need to change your attitude so you can run into obstacles without losing your cool.

Developing more patience will make your life run smoother. It’s like acquiring any other skill. You’ll need to practice regularly.

Start with minor irritations and work your way up to handling bigger challenges. Take a look at these exercises for developing more patience.

Basic Exercises for Increasing Patience:

1. Spot your triggers. Figure out what frustrates you and why. It could be certain events or words. Ask your family and friends for feedback if you’re not sure about what usually sets you off.

2. Keep a journal. While you’re trying to develop more patience, it helps to keep a record of your activities. Use your phone or a notepad to count the number of times you feel stressed and describe the situations.

3. Slow down. Rushing around creates more tension. Pause for a moment when you feel overwhelmed, so you can resist the urge to speed up.

4. Meditate on your breath. Try to maintain a daily meditation practice. Even a few minutes of deep breathing can be beneficial. Put aside other thoughts as you focus on each inhalation and exhalation.

5. Relax your muscles. Scan your body when something disturbing happens, so you can release tension quickly. Smooth your brows and unclench your jaw. Soften your neck and shoulders. Gently rub your back or any sore spots.

6. Take care of basic needs. Dehydration, hunger, and lack of sleep can threaten your composure. Carry a water bottle and healthy snacks with you so you can refuel as needed. Go to bed early and aim for at least 7 hours of sleep each night.

7. Enjoy the weather. Heat, cold, rain, and snow can teach you to embrace change or at least tolerate discomfort. Buy a beautiful, warm coat or think about plants that need water to grow.

Advanced Exercises for Increasing Patience:

1. Delay gratification. Practice waiting for what you want. Postpone purchases for a day or two before you buy new shoes or sports equipment. Go for a walk before you eat dessert.

2. Set priorities. Are you trying to do too much? Delete nonessential tasks from your to do list. You’ll have more time for the things that really matter to you.

3. Adjust your expectations. Technology conditions us to expect things quickly, like groceries delivered to your door or streaming movies and music on demand. Remember that important projects usually require significant time and effort.

4. Evaluate the outcomes. Losing your patience might be tempting if the clerks at the DMV escorted you to the front of the line and fed you ice cream while they completed your paperwork. However, you usually just wind up feeling less-than-satisfied when you lose your patience.

5. Listen closely. Do you become edgy when your children ask multiple questions or coworkers talk so long that a meeting runs overtime? Instead of tuning them out, give them your full attention. You’ll probably feel calmer and you may learn something new.

6. Be thankful and helpful. Gratitude and generosity are the ultimate recipe for patience. Count your blessings so you can keep minor irritations in perspective. Think about what you can share with others instead of focusing on your own comfort.

Increasing your patience will make you happier and better-liked by others. You’ll experience less stress and find it easier to get what you want.