11 Ways to Build Lasting Self-Estee

11 Ways to Build Lasting Self-Estee

Self-esteem is essentially the quality of being pleased with yourself. The opposite of having high self-esteem is loathing yourself, which is obviously a challenging way to live. Learning how to be happy with yourself can benefit you in every other aspect of your life. You’ll be a lot happier in general, too.

Learn to love yourself and raise your self-esteem with these tips:

1. Volunteer. Demonstrate to yourself that you’re a good person by giving some of your spare time to a worthy cause. You’ll feel better about yourself than if you’d spent the same time watching a TV series marathon instead.

2. Do something each day that you’re good at. We feel competent and confident while doing something that we know we’re good at. Make a list of the things you know in your heart that you do well. Do at least one of them each day and notice how you feel.

3. Remind yourself of your successes daily. Spend a few minutes each day reviewing your successes. Include recent as well as successes from the past. You’ve done a lot of great things. Avoid forgetting about them.

4. Avoid comparing yourself to others. There’s always someone that does something better than you. Just remember that there are things you can do better than them, too.

5. Increase your knowledge or expertise. Constant improvement is a sure path to greater self-esteem. Keep improving yourself and your capabilities, and you’ll be more impressed with yourself. What do you want to become better at doing? What would you like to know more about?

6. Release yourself from your mistakes. Allow your mistakes from the past to fade away. You can do this by forgiving yourself and keeping your mind focused on what is happening in the present time.

– You don’t know anyone that has never failed or made a mistake. This includes your closest friends and family members. You don’t hold their mistakes against them, so how can you hold them against yourself?

7. Stick to your values. When you fail to live up to your values, you won’t feel very good about yourself. Understand your values and live them each day.

8. Face a fear. Having too many fears can lessen the level of self-esteem we experience. Overcome a fear and you’ll be amazed with yourself. Start with a small fear and work your way up.

9. Avoid doing things just to please others. Going too far to please or impress others demonstrates to you that your own preferences, values, and happiness come in second place. Be considerate of others but strive to make yourself happy.

10. Be able to say “no”. The inability to say “no” to others shows that you give too much preference to others and too little to yourself. Show yourself that you matter by being able to refuse the requests of others when appropriate. You’ll receive more respect from others, too.

11. Define what you believe a good person should be. You can’t be happy with yourself if you don’t have a target to strive for. Understand what it will take to feel a high level of self-esteem. Each day, you can choose to be the type of person you described.

Work on your self-esteem each day. It doesn’t sit at a constant level for most people. Good days, weeks, and months tends to raise it. Experiencing bad periods of time tends to reduce it.

A great start is to decide on your values and then use them as a guide as you make decisions throughout the day. This is the foundation of high, and lasting, self-esteem.

What’s your level of emotional intelligence?

Find out if your emotional intelligence is helping or hindering your growth! .

I am a Board Certified Life Coach, a Board Certified Health Coach, and a teacher of Mindfulness Living who helps people unlock their potential and live life on Purpose

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How to Fight Negative Thoughts and Feelings

8 Effective Habits for the Successful Entrepreneur

8 Effective Habits for the Successful Entrepreneur

Every career has a set of habits that greatly increase the odds of success. The habits necessary for success will vary from career to career. Fortunately, there are many successful entrepreneurs that we can look to for guidance. It’s not surprising that many of them share the same habits.

There’s no reason why you can’t have the same habits as some of the most successful people in the world!

Increase your odds for success with these habits:

 

1. An incredible work ethic. It takes a lot of time and effort to grow a company. It’s necessary at first to be a jack-of-all-trades. Until you can grow enough to hire others to cover all the required skills your company needs to thrive, you’re going to have to carry a lot of weight.

2. Conscientiousness. When you own a business, it’s up to you to ensure that things are done properly and on time. The responsibilities are great. You don’t have the luxury of putting out sloppy work. It will always come back to haunt you.

3. Use time wisely. Time will always be a limited resource. How you use your time dictates how successful your company ultimately becomes. That means having the knowledge and experience to make wise decisions and the mental toughness to avoid distractions.

4. Have a plan each day. One of the keys to using your time successfully is to plan for each day ahead of time. Avoid going to bed without having a detailed idea of what you’re going to do the following day. When your feet hit the bedroom floor, you should already know what needs to be done for the day.

5. Wake up early. There are very few successful entrepreneurs that don’t get up very early. Some get up even before 4 a.m. How early you get up is up to you, but if you’re not beating the average person out of bed, you’re behind.

6. Set goals. It’s not enough to work hard and work smart. You also must know where you’re going. Goals help you make wise decisions. Know what you’re trying to accomplish today, this week, this month, this year, and 10 years from now.

7. Deal with stress effectively. Entrepreneurs have plenty of stress to deal with on a regular basis, so it’s important to learn how to manage it. Have a process for dealing with stress and anxiety. Learn to recognize what you can control and what you cannot.

8. Look ahead for obstacles. Avoid being blindsided by obstacles and setbacks. Be aware of your future. Look ahead for the challenges that you’re likely to face and have solutions in mind.

– Think of all the major challenges in your life and notice that there were plenty of warning signs for all of them. The same is true with your business. Avoid putting your head in the sand and hoping for the best. Deal with challenges now while they’re still manageable.

What are your current habits? Can you see why your current habits have either helped you or harmed you on your path to business success? Think about what you want to accomplish to be successful and build a set of habits that will support those activities.

 

The person with the best habits usually wins. How far will you go with your habits?

What’s your level of emotional intelligence?

Find out if your emotional intelligence is helping or hindering your growth! .

I am a Board Certified Life Coach, a Board Certified Health Coach, and a teacher of Mindfulness Living who helps people unlock their potential and live life on Purpose

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How to Fight Negative Thoughts and Feelings

The Climb Fable

The Climb Fable

The Climb

the story of a teeny tiny lion cub

Leonard the lion cub entered into the tree climbing competition…

…but his size was the talk of the tribe!

Short Story

The annual lion cub tree climbing competition was just around the corner. The cubs lined up to enroll themselves in the race.

All cubs were growing at the same rate, well, all except Leonard. He was the teeny tiniest cub in town!

As Leonard joined the enrollment line, another cub said, “Hey shrimp, do you actually think you’ve got a shot?”

“Well, I sure do think I have a shot at winning, or at least placing second,” said Leonard.

“Ha! This kid actually thinks he has a shot at winning! He’s so naïve!” screamed one of the cubs while the whole clan laughed in unison.

“This race is for lion cubs, not kittens. Scram, little one!” yelled another cub while barely holding back his laughter.

Leonard felt embarrassed, but he stood in line and enrolled in the race

The ridicule lit a fire under Leonard. He was determined to win the race!

Every day until the race, Leonard practiced climbing trees for hours. He felt his body becoming stronger and his agility increasing with each climb. Soon enough, he was climbing in record time!

When the race rolled around, the other cubs ridiculed Leonard. But Leonard remained focused on his goal.

As the lion cubs waited impatiently for the results, the judges declared Leonard the winner! Because of his hard work, Leonard climbed the tree in 22 seconds! The cub that took 2nd place clocked in at 47 seconds.

While Leonard proudly wore his metal, the other contestants swept him off his paws. They carried him in the air while chanting, “Leonard! Leonard! Leonard!”

MORAL: Remain confident in yourself, even if you are different from others.

Personal reflection.

Leonard didn’t allow the mean- spirited comments about his size to get him down. Instead of feeling sorry for himself and walking away, he chose to prove himself to everyone and faced his challenge head on.

Because of his confidence and hard work, he prevailed. He won the race by a wide margin.

Like Leonard, almost everyone has a feature or shortcoming that others can easily tear apart.

Surprisingly, those who poke fun at others are generally trying to cover up their own insecurities by bullying someone else.

Maybe you think you’re too short, too fat, too thin, or too tall. To compensate for your insecurities, you likely seek approval from others. But you are the only person who can really make you feel good about yourself. All the complements in the world are of no use to a person who doesn’t believe them

Make today the day that you stop chasing approval from others.

Even if you are short, tall, fat, or thin, so what? Will this stop you from living a fulfilling life or chasing that promotion? It certainly shouldn’t.

Unfortunately, too many people allow their insecurities to dictate their worth. Don’t be one of these people; you can be the exception!

You are the boss of your life. And only you can determine whether you fail or succeed.

Chase every dream you have! Go for the girl, pursue that promotion, buy that house, or start your own business. With the proper amount of confidence and skill, the sky is the limit!

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. What are your unique assets?

2. What are your insecurities and what can you do to overcome them?

3. How do you respond to those who intentionally put you down?

What’s your level of emotional intelligence?

Find out if your emotional intelligence is helping or hindering your growth! .

I am a Board Certified Life Coach, a Board Certified Health Coach, and a teacher of Mindfulness Living who helps people unlock their potential and live life on Purpose

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How to Fight Negative Thoughts and Feelings

Rewards encourage consistency.

Rewards encourage consistency.

I treat others with the same kindness that I extend to myself. It is important for maintaining trust in relationships. I celebrate my achievements as well as those of others.

Although I sometimes set different standards for myself than for others, I extend rewards based on outlined expectations.

Knowing that there is a system of rewards encourages me to be consistent with my actions. This approach works with maintaining a lifestyle of wellness. Complying with daily fitness goals is easy because I acknowledge my own positive results.

I treat myself to a spa day when I hit a major milestone on my fitness journey. It is important to keep myself motivated for the long term.

The same approach works with my kids and their chores. Instead of requiring occasional conformance, I challenge them to make doing chores a part of their norm. I treat them to their favorite dessert after a week of good work.

When doing performance evaluations of my staff at work, I celebrate small things. When they see that even small efforts are rewarded, I gain their commitment to bigger ones. Sometimes starting small produces lasting and meaningful results.

Today, I use a formula of rewards to encourage ongoing positive behavior. I am happy to highlight any person’s achievement when doing so encourages them to keep up the effort.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. What are some of the rewards that I extend to my colleagues at work?

2. How do I ensure that I continue to be a committed friend?

3. What actions am I consistent with without receiving rewards?

What’s your level of emotional intelligence?

Find out if your emotional intelligence is helping or hindering your growth! .

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How to Fight Negative Thoughts and Feelings

A 7-Step Process to Overcome Fear and Self-Doubt

A 7-Step Process to Overcome Fear and Self-Doubt

Fear and self-doubt are two things that every normal person faces. These are also two of the biggest obstacles to success and happiness.

Some people feel more fear and self-doubt than others. And, some are better at overcoming these emotions than others.

Regardless of where you fall on the fear/self-doubt spectrum, there are many things you can do to rise above these emotions.

Conquer your fear and self-doubt with this process:

1. Identify what you’re actually afraid of. What do you really fear? Most of us don’t have to worry about being eaten by tigers. Our lives are rarely in danger. The most common fears in a modern society are failure and making a fool out of one’s self. Of course, there are others.

* If you want to start a business, but can’t seem to get started, what is your real concern?

* Maybe you want to ask out a coworker on a date. What is the real fear? They certainly aren’t going to hit you over the head with a rock.

* Be aware of your actual fear, and then you’ll have a chance of addressing it.

2. Find situations related to your fear that are only mildly uncomfortable. Perhaps you have a fear of public speaking. What could you do that’s similar, but less terrifying? You could:

* Give a speech to a group of friends

* Start conversations with strangers

* Visualize yourself giving a speech

* Do more group activities and speak up more

* If you’re afraid of heights, you could start by looking down over a 2nd floor balcony and slowly work your way up to greater heights.

3. Take action. Thinking creates and magnifies fear. Taking action lessens fear. One of the best ways to get over fear is to immediately take action before you have a chance to talk yourself out of it.

* Most people would be more successful, happier, and less afraid if they thought less and did more.

4. Visualize yourself being unafraid. Imagine you have a twin that’s similar to you, but different in other ways. If you could build the perfect twin, what would they be like? What skills, beliefs, and attitudes would they have? How would they handle the situation that creates fear in you?

* Allow yourself to become that twin.

5. Give yourself small successes. Set yourself up to win. Make the game so easy that you can’t fail. As you gain confidence, up the stakes a little. Get used to being successful in the situations that cause you to feel fear.

* If the thought of making 100 cold calls a day makes you break out in a cold sweat, give yourself the goal of making just one cold call. The next day, you can do three.

* Show yourself that you can do it. Show yourself that nothing bad is going to happen to you.

6. Be realistic. What is the worst consequence you are likely to endure if the thing you fear comes true? It’s probably not anything you can’t handle!

* What happens if the publisher rejects your book? What if your speech doesn’t go well? What’s actually going to happen to you? Will you still be safe? Will your family still love you?

7. Get help. Whether you need some help from a friend or a professional, there’s no shame in getting help. You would get help if your car’s engine blew up. You’d get help if you had a broken leg. Get the help you need to deal with your fears.

How much do you allow fear and self-doubt to rule your life? Imagine what your life would be like if you could overcome all of your fears and self-doubt.

Most people avoid the actions that trigger these uncomfortable feelings. You can do better. You can act in the face of these emotions and live your life to the fullest.

What’s your level of emotional intelligence?

Find out if your emotional intelligence is helping or hindering your growth! .

I am a Board Certified Life Coach, a Board Certified Health Coach, and a teacher of Mindfulness Living who helps people unlock their potential and live life on Purpose

Receive, via email, our Action Guides, EBooks, Worksheets, Checklist, and Life Tips we only share with our communtiy

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How to Fight Negative Thoughts and Feelings

Declutter Your Mind And Enjoy Inner Peace

Declutter Your Mind And Enjoy Inner Peace

No sane person has ever claimed they had a mind that was too clear and peaceful. We’d all like to feel less cluttered and more peaceful and relaxed.

Decluttering your mind is largely the result of decluttering all aspects of your life.

We tend to put too many burdens on our minds, but there’s a more effective way to live. With a few simple hacks, you can reduce the load on your mind and give it the peace it craves.

Add serenity to your life with these techniques:

1. Remove the challenging people from your life. There are people that take up a lot of space in your brain. Some of those people are optional in your life, and you might not even like them! Why are you keeping them around?

– Be willing to let go of the people that take more time and effort than they’re worth to you.

2. Remove unnecessary activities from your life. This could be committees you serve on, sports teams you play on, or going out on Thursday nights. Maybe you’re taking accordion lessons but realize that you’re not enjoying it that much. Cut these activities out of your life and gain the gift of time.

3. Declutter your environment. Your mind and inner peace are affected by your environment. This includes your home, workspace, and anywhere else you spend a significant amount of time. Have you ever noticed how nice it feels when your home is clean? You can feel that way all of the time.

4. Meditate. Meditation might be the ultimate way to declutter your mind and enjoy inner peace. Meditation is very simple but challenging to do well. However, it’s possible to receive many benefits from meditation even if you’re a beginner.

– There are many resources online that can teach you the basics of meditation.

– Twenty minutes of meditation each day can change your life and bring inner peace.

5. Write things down. Trying to remember things puts a huge load on your mind. You can never truly relax when you have to remember to do something. Write things down and use alarms. Knowing that something else will keep track of your obligations for you will allow your mind to relax.

6. Mono-task. Forget about multitasking. It’s ineffective and creates stress. Limit yourself to one task at a time. You’ll feel better and get much more accomplished.

– Try it for a day. Do one task at a time and focus all of your attention on that task. Notice how much better you feel while working and at the end of the day.

7. Make fewer decisions. The fewer decisions you have to make each day, the more inner peace you’ll feel.

– For example, limiting your wardrobe makes it easier to figure out what to wear each day. Even better, pick out your outfit for the following day before you go to bed.

– You can eat the same healthy breakfast each morning.

– Look for ways to minimize the number of decisions you have to make.

8. Get enough sleep. Notice how cluttered your mind feels after a poor night of sleep. Experiment to determine the proper amount of sleep your mind and body need each night.

9. Limit your exposure to the news and social media. The news and social media will drive you crazy if you spend too much time consuming them. It’s important to stay aware of what’s happening in the world, but you don’t have to bombard yourself with negative information day and night.

Treat your mind like you would an injured body part. You would reduce the amount of work it has to do and treat it gently. Most of us ask our minds to do more than it was designed to do. Give your mind a break and gain the peace you crave!

What’s your level of emotional intelligence?

Find out if your emotional intelligence is helping or hindering your growth! .

I am a Board Certified Life Coach, a Board Certified Health Coach, and a teacher of Mindfulness Living who helps people unlock their potential and live life on Purpose

Receive, via email, our Action Guides, EBooks, Worksheets, Checklist, and Life Tips we only share with our communtiy

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How to Fight Negative Thoughts and Feelings